I was flipping channels on late night TV when I came across Tyler Perry being interviewed by Oprah. Tyler Perry was crying. And Oprah was crying. Soon I was crying along with them.
Tyler Perry told Oprah he was molested while he was growing up. It happened a number of times over a number of years by a number of people. Tyler wondered how child molesters kept finding him? What was it about him?
My brother sexually molested me while I was growing up. I admired him. He was the golden boy. I was fat, shy, and always scared.
Tyler said he felt guilty and responsible. Boys don't get molested. Or if they do, they don't talk about it. Tyler said that sometimes it felt good. It was confusing. He used to wonder if was his fault. Not any more.
I idolized my brother. Every week before the game, I would scrape the dried mud from his cleats, spread black polish on his shoe and buff it to a shine. I wanted him to like me. When he touch me, I felt so scared. I was in a hole and I felt like I was sinking deeper and deeper. There was no ladder--no way to get out. All I could do was to stand still and hope that the hole would not collapse with me in it.
Tyler Perry is talking about what happened to him. He is no longer the victim. It is no longer his secret. He knows that he didn't do anything wrong.
Tyler said he has forgiven his father, but he does not trust him. I cried as I watched him on TV. I still am crying. He is standing up for himself and doesn't need to protect his abusers; he tells his truth. Did his abusers protect him? Did my abusers protect me?
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